Thom Rainer Answers My Question (Part Two)

In so many words my question was: "Dr. Rainer would you not say that the main reason why these students are dropping out is because the church is not lovingly holding parents accountable to disciple their children and then equipping them to do so?" Dr. Rainer's answer was astute and timely...

He quickly responded with (and I am paraphrasing), "You have hit the nail on the head." He also stated, "Our research shows that the students who do remain in church are the ones whose parents have played a significant role in their discipleship."

This obviously came as no shock to me. This is the message that I have had the privilege of proclaiming along with others like Steve Wright, Blake Hickman, Chris Swann, Dr. Wes Black, Dr. Richard Ross, Dr. Randy Stinson, etc. There was a real reason, however, that I wanted Dr. Rainer to share that answer from the floor of the conference in front of many pastors and student pastors. That reason is that this message for the most part, is not being taught in our seminaries. It is not being taught by our state denominational leaders. It has not been placed before the majority of our pastors and student pastors as a clarion call to reform the current ailing culture of family and church.

Being at this conference helped me to realize more than ever that, in the trenches, we are shooting at the enemy with cap guns. And the sad thing about it is that the experts who should be equipping our front line soldiers are the ones handing out the cap guns. The only weapon that can sufficiently address this crisis is the truth that is stated as principle in Deuteronomy 6:4-9 and is reinforced as doctrine in Ephesians 6:4

Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.
- Deuteronomy 6:4-7


Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger,but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
- Ephesians 6:4

Thom Rainer Answers My Question (Part One)

I had the privilege of attending the 2008 Evangelism Conference of Southern Baptists in North Carolina this week. It was a singular experience in many ways. I hope that in the coming days that I can unpack my experiences for you here. For right now, however, let me give you a little teaser for what I want to talk about at length in tomorrows post.

One of the main plenary sessions of this conference was a presentation by Dr. Thom Rainer. Dr. Rainer is the president of Lifeway Christian Resources. He is a gifted speaker and teacher and we are blessed to have a man of his insight and wisdom at the helm of such an influential organization like Lifeway. In his session, Dr. Rainer presented 12 trends of modern churches and those who attend them. One of the trends that he presented was:

70% of young people between the ages of 18-22 drop out of church and many never return.

At the end of his presentation, Dr. Rainer took questions from the floor. As I sat there listening. I knew that this opportunity was too great to pass up, so I motioned to the man with the mic and asked Dr. Rainer my question.

In so many words my questions was: "Dr. Rainer would you not say that the main reason why these students are dropping out is because the church is not lovingly holding parents accountable to disciple their children and then equipping them to do so?" Dr. Rainer's answer was astute and timely...

I will share his answer to my question and some other observations about the conference in tomorrow's post.

Crazy Thoughts

Something that Mike posted last week got me thinking. Mike commented on a conversation that he was made aware of between a student and a former professor that had left him alarmed. It got me to thinking, "What would my college and seminary professors think of me if they knew where I stood theologically and philosophically in regards to the church and to student ministry?" I dare say they would be shocked.

Honestly, some would be shocked that I was thinking at all. That statement is as genuine as I can say it. I was not known in my academic pursuits for being one to take academic pursuits seriously. I was the guy who never participated in theological or philosophical "discussions" because I thought they were just stupid. If things starting getting tense in a class, I was likely to begin climbing under my desk to curl up in the fetal position. It wasn't that I thought these issues weren't worth dialoguing about, it was more that I knew that each time these issues came up, no real dialogue was going to take place.

I wrote a post last year talking about how I was glad that in both my undergrad at LU and in my seminary at SEBTS, I was blessed to have professors, for the most part, who never tried to force their theological views down my throat. I praise God for that. It has helped me to become what I am today in that realm. In that area, I was encouraged to search the scriptures and to yield to the Spirit for guidance. However, one bone I would have to pick with them would be in regards to ministry philosophy and methodology. In that area, there was not a lot of room for debate.

I was a student in the bigger is better, more the merrier, era of student ministry training. I don't really remember being taught what real ministry looked like. I don't remember discussing James 1 in any youth class. I don't remember a whole lot of discussion about equipping families to assume their God given authority in the life of their teenager. As a matter of fact, most all that I heard was the exact opposite.

And so I am left to wonder. If I had to have a conversation about theology and philosophy in regards to the church and to student ministry, how would that conversation end? I would pray there would be some good dialogue, but honestly, I don't know how hopeful I would be.

Redrawing The Lines

If you haven't figured it out by now, I am an idealist. I believe that culture of family and church in most evangelical circles is not what it should be. I believe that we have allowed satan to erase the lines that help direct us to what God desires for our churches and families. What is very humbling is that in times past, I have been used by satan to do this work of erasing. I suppose that is why I am so passionate about making sure that the lines get redrawn. The days ahead are way too precious to waste wondering where to go for lack of direction.

So what are these lines? Well, Let me suggest 4 that we would do well to redraw in our churches and families:

1. Line One: Daily Spiritual Warfare - Ask any of my brothers in ministry and they will tell you that I am a broken record when it comes to this one. It's hard to re-draw a line that you don't realize has been erased. Doing spiritual warfare daily helps you to see what the enemy is doing and to find the help that the Lord is so ready to offer. As a resource to help you this area, download this very simple daily reminder: Daily Preparation For Spiritual Warfare

2. Line Two: Family Worship - This line is sorely lacking and any improvement in this area would help tremendously. It's not rocket science, its just families at least once a week turning off the TV and opening God's Word together. If you don't know where to start Providence Baptist Church has a 7 year Bible Reading Plan that you can easily download and follow.

3. Line Three: Churches That Equip Families - Churches have to re-focus their mission on equipping families instead of replacing them. We need churches and families that cooperate and help one another. This is the dynamic coming together of Deuteronomy 32:46-47 and Acts 2:42. This may sound simple, but its not. It's radical and its going to take some radical pastors to redraw this line. A good reference for this line is a book entitled reThink by: Steve Wright.

4. Line Four: The Preaching and Teaching of the Gospel - This line above all others is the one that satan fears the most. It is the only means of changing the hearts and minds of people. No lasting change can occur except through the teaching of the simple gospel. In fact the gospel is so simple, that until we are willing to simplify our lives to get down to its level we will continue to pass it by on the way to our next Bible study. If you need some encouragement in this area, let me recommend a book entitled The Bruised Reed by: Richard Sibbes.

Okay, so I am an idealist. I believe that someone is going to read this and take up their chalk to start redrawing with me. If you do, leave a comment and let me know. It's always easier when you have a helping hand.

The Greatest Barrier To Church Reform

As our families go, so go our churches. I am convinced of this more than ever. To deny this fact is not only silly, it's irresponsible. Yet, even this week, I was confronted by the thoughts of a youth ministry educator who patently denied that equipping parents is the corrective for students dropping out of churches. When I hear such sentiments it really clarifies why so many of our young student ministry leaders are poorly informed. I, however, will save that discussion for a later time.

I think I have come up with a theory why its is so difficult for churches to change the way they approach student ministry, and ministry in general for that matter. The reason is not Biblical per se, it is cultural. We have allowed the culture to shape how we do family and church so much that things that were expected in previous generations are foreign and novel to us today. For instance, consider the practice of family worship.

There was a time when it would have been an embarrassment for a father to forsake the regular reading of God's word, praying, and worshipping in his home with his family. Somewhere along the line a lie crept into the minds of our parents (dad's in particular) that they didn't need to do that because, after all, that was what they paid the youth pastor to do. This led to youth pastors having to take on responsibilities that were never meant to be theirs and has landed us right in the middle of the youth drop-out crisis we are in today. The hard part of fixing this problem is that for reform to occur, it is going to require changing the cultural mindset of both families and pastors and its going to have to start with pastors. This is where it gets tricky.

I admire the honesty and integrity of men who follow God's call to be pastors. It's not a job for the faint of heart. Yet, if they are not willing to change the culture of their own homes, then there is no point expecting the youth pastors and much less the parents in their churches to do the same. At some point, some radical is going to have to stand in his pulpit and say, "I don't care if it costs me my ministry and my livelihood, I am going to put my family first and take the leadership for seeing my children are discipled." This is not easy.

Please keep in mind, I am not saying that churches should do away with student ministry. Far from it. I think the need for student ministry is greater than ever. The focus of student ministry, however, has to be equipping parents to do what God has called them to do and then coming alongside them to hold them accountable and to help them. This is also not easy.

Yes, I believe the greatest barrier to real church reform is a wrong cultural idea of what families and churches are supposed to be like. If somehow this stony ground can be plowed, then maybe we can begin to see God sow some seeds that will result in a great spiritual harvest. What is at stake is not trivial it is a matter of life and death at least that was Moses opinion...

[Moses] said to them, "Take to heart all the words I have solemnly declared to you this day, so that you may command your children to obey carefully all the words of this law. They are not just idle words for you—they are your life."
- Deuteronomy 32:46-47a